When I started my period at 13, the pressure was turning up and she often said, “If you need to go to the doctor about anything, I will take you; no questions asked.” Although it was comforting, I knew it wasn’t true. My mom is nosy enough, but I was just happy that she wasn’t overbearing. Then I turned 16.
With my first boyfriend in tow, again, she gave me a life lesson that I will never forget: “When you’re old enough to go buy condoms yourself, then you are old enough to have sex.” After 5 months of being together, I felt that I was ready, so I went over to the local grocery store and bought some condoms. And although I had fun when I had sex, it was just that. Just fun. It was fun faking an orgasm. You know what kind of orgasm I’m talking about – the ones you see/hear from the better porn collection. For him, it was great and for me, it was fun faking it (I wanted to be an actress at the time).
Flash forward to college. More and more I started to get involved with the sexuality courses at my school and for some reason, my persona emanated sex, so naturally everyone (friends and strangers) would talk to me about their sex lives and I would ask them tons of questions regarding their sex lives. Everyone was so willing to answer, so naturally I believed that this was my calling. I wasn’t getting famous from my acting skills anytime soon, so I started changing directions.
One day, Dr. Ruth came into our Variations in Human Sexuality class. That’s the moment where I knew that that is what I wanted to do. I figured that I could do the things that she’s doing, but I can make it sexier. I wanted to project free sexuality like Josephine Baker with the intelligence of a famous Black Sex Therapist. I wanted to draw people in like moths. That, and when I asked my friends if they were having orgasms, they looked at me as if “orgasm” was a foreign word. From then on, I decided that I wanted to empower women to have more orgasms and to be free with their sexual wants, needs and desires. If women aren’t happy, the world isn’t happy and I’m on a mission to make the world a better place.
My mom (the best mom in the world) said something that resonates with me every day. She said, “If you want something bad enough, you make the time for it.” And it’s true. When I’m up at 3 o’clock in the morning working on Velvet Lips stuff, it’s because I’m determined to get something finished. I wish I had the same motivation for working out as I do for my company, but that’s a subject for another day.
When I started my company, Velvet Lips, in March 2010, I had an ongoing battle on whether I had the time or desire to do a blog. Now, here I am in August of 2011 and am finally comfortable with getting it started. Although I’m not super familiar with blogging, it’s nice to read them every once in a while. I’ve grabbed bits of information here and there, but I’ve never commented on anything. I guess everyone has their opinions and expertise which could be useful to read, but in this world of short attention spans, it seems like I hardly have the time (seems to be a running theme in my life).
So I titled this particular blog based on myself, of course. I named the company after myself and the tantalizing effects that happen when you say “Velvet Lips.” Go ahead; say it slowly in your sexy, deep voice. Now picture that image in your head. It’s a sexy one and it can mean so many different things. If you have a pair (or more!) of your own, I invite you to touch them. Don’t they feel great?
My Velvet Lips are personal and political in every way, but don’t let the feminism fool you. Velvet Lips knows how to communicate in ways that are seductive, enchanting and omnipotent.
With that said, this blog will be
- Political, and
And it will include
- References from my personal life – past, present and future
- Reflections from my workshops and coaching sessions
- References to other peoples’ sexuality work, and
- And so much more!
So now you need to get on the bandwagon and look for more! So far, I’m looking forward to joining the blogging and micro-blogging community and hope to develop more followers! Talk to you soon!