Velvet Lips | Better Sex, Deeper Intimacy
Velvet Lips is one of Atlanta’s first sex-positive sex education venues offering classes and workshops using Somatic Sex Education and other techniques to foster personal discovery, open dialogue, and increase sexual awareness.
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Better Sex, Deeper Intimacy

04 Dec 2014, by Marla Stewart in Sexual Voyaging

This past week has been full of excitement as the creator of “Better Sex & Deeper Intimacy” workshop, Naima Singletary, arrived at my house in preparation for this workshop.  When I picked her up from the airport, I knew she was a kindred spirit, constantly being guided by the God within her as she’s presenting throughout the States.

Originally from San Francisco (yay!), I knew that our beliefs about sexuality and spirituality were along the same lines.  But there’s something about Naima – her conscious breathwork and her raw attitude forces you to take a look at all of her, fully engulfing your senses and engaging in your own inner dialogue about what she’s bringing to the moment that you’re sharing.

The day before the workshop, we set up a table at Sevananda and engaged with customers as they came by.  Naima captured people’s attention by asking them about their sex lives and questioning them about their intimacy levels.  Some people walked right by without batting an eye, but most people were thrilled that someone was asking them about their sex life and a lot of people reported that it could always be better. When questioned about their sex life, some interesting responses were:

“Ha!  It doesn’t exist.”

“Well, I’m married, so you know…”

“It’s great!  But it could always be better!”

It was a beautiful thing to see all these people engaging about their sex life.  It was clear that some of them needed to talk more about sex lives, so as you can guess, I was grateful when I saw some folks come back the following day for the workshop!

Yesterday evening, it was time for the workshop.  Many had found the workshop via Creative Loafing, via Meetup (yay Sex Scholars!) or by the flyers that were put up in the shop.  The social buzz was out and I was contacted by Atlanta’s Rock Station 100.5 to come in and check out the workshop to scope out what we’re all about.  We ended up getting a radio spot this morning and Naima quickly conducted a shorter version of her ‘medicinal hug’ with the radio hosts of The Regular Guy Show.  You can check out the pictures HERE on Facebook.

At the workshop, I lovingly introduced Naima and she started with asking everyone about their name and why they are there.  Most people were curious (as well they should be).  After the introductions, she facilitated an exercise around ‘medicinal hugs’ where people were asked to hug a stranger and try to connect to that stranger while getting to know that stranger intuitively through the hug.  After an in-depth discussion about the hugs and those feelings about the hugs, she facilitated an exercise where people got in front of the room and sat in the hot seat.  Anyone from the crowd was able to ask anything they wanted to to the person in the hot seat and when the asker was satisfied with the person in the hot seat’s answer, they had to respond with “thank you.”  Often times, many folks had multiple questions ranging from same-sex interactions to relationship strategies to just being uncomfortable about answering honestly with their sexuality.

There’s no question, Naima made people feel uncomfortable.  She questioned people’s intention.  She raised awareness around race, age and sexuality.  She pushed people and if it’s something that you’re not used to, there was a button that was bound to be pushed.  She’s brutally honest and completely embodied.  When she had reactions to people’s answers or to reactions to what people said, she unapologetically communicated all of her feelings, which were based in her own reality.

Overall, it was an eye-opening experience about the rawness of vulnerability, the need that we have to be intimate, the learning that comes from being uncomfortable and thinking critically about how we navigate life.

If you want to check her out, you can go to her website or listen to her radio show.

Better Sex & Deeper Intimacy presented by Naima Singletary

 

1 COMMENT
  • Susan Reply

    Yes, I would like to comment about my experience at this event and I will keep it as brief as possible. Let me first state that I have a Master’s in Psychology and Counseling and it’s one thing to be “brutally honest and completely embodied”. It’s another to be rude and disrespectful to your guest. When asked by Naima why I came to the event, I honestly responded, “because you asked me to come.” Her response to my answer, shockingly enough was “Bullshit!” Which left me baffled. And when I asked someone their age on the Hot Seat, Naima blurted out… “that question is shallow as shit!” Now, I personally didn’t hear Naima curse at anyone else in the room and I never met her a day in my life, so I don’t know what her beef was with me, and at this point, I don’t care to know… but I left the seminar feeling totally disrespected and I didn’t learn a thing about intimacy from her. It was suggested that I email her and ask for an explanation or apology but I personally dont think she would have anything pleasant to say. I think it’s sad to pay money to support an event just to be talked to like trash from a complete stranger. Thank you.

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