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If you are a lover of the vagina and vulva (I’m almost certain you are!), you may have come across a time or two when you were thinking about how to make her or how you can squirt/ejaculate. A lot of people tell me that they have come across a woman or two who have done it, but nothing that has ever been consistent. Sometimes, it’s not wanted and most of the time, it’s well-appreciated. Squirting and/or getting someone to squirt can be an enjoyable feeling. Squirting can also spark shock, fear, and/or anxiety in some folks; especially if they don’t know what’s going on! Remember, it goes without saying, relaxation and lubrication are a must (and protection if needed or status unknown). Find the G-Spot by starting 1-2 inches in and one inch up. Go towards the sides of the vaginal wall and locate the tissue because it’s different in every person.

Whether you’re the squirter (the one who squirts) or the squirtee (the one who gets squirted on), here’s some helpful tips to maximize the enjoyment from your squirting experience.

​“I’m a squirter. I ALWAYS squirt.”

​If you’re the squirter and you know you’re a squirter, please give that other person the heads up that you’re a squirter. Some people don’t like the idea of surprise squirts (especially in their face), so it’s helpful if you give them the heads up and tell them that you’re a squirter before sex. For example, if you are getting oral sex and say the words “I’m cumming” to them, they may just figure that you’re about to have an orgasm. However, they might not know that that orgasm is going to be coupled with a full mouth of ejaculate, which could possibly ruin a great experience. If they’re into it, great! Your sexual compatibility might be fostered in that instant! Who wouldn’t want to bond over an awesome squirting experience?

​In addition, if you’re a squirter, take a moment to prep your space if you can. Ejaculate can flow out of your vagina discreetly or it can push through like a fire hose, so if you know what which kind happens the most, you can prep the space in the best way you can. I recommend getting a nice mattress pad for the bed or ensuring that blankets are covering your furniture. However, even if you don’t have those things, vaginal ejaculate is pretty easy to clean up.

​“I like to squirt. I SOMETIMES squirt.”

​A lot of us fall in this category of “maybe I will squirt this time?” and there are two ways that we can manage this. To rid any anxiety or doubt, tell your lover that it might happen. Make sure you have that conversation and like the regular squirters, make sure your space is prepped for any incidental happenings. 

​If you feel yourself getting ready to squirt, it’s a good idea to give your lover a code word or action. An action (particularly during oral sex) can benefit you the best because then your lover won’t think that you’re saying just another dirty talk phrase (if they’re into that sort of thing). A phrase or action that is dedicated only to your squirting incidences can also benefit you in the long run because they can be used again and again and with a steady lover, can even build arousal and anticipation of the incidence.

​“I never squirt. But I would LIKE TO squirt.”

​For those of you who have never squirted, but would like to know how you can go about achieving it, it’s all about knowing your body and practice, practice, practice. If you truly want to know how you can squirt, you need to know where your G-Spot is and what it feels like. It’s a spongy tissue that feels like the roof of your mouth. Knowing where this is will get you a heads up on where your lover should be spending their time. Although they can stimulate the G-Spot in a variety of ways (including anally), pointing them in the right direction will be useful in experiencing your bliss (I’m a little biased, can’t you tell?). 

​And although knowing your G-Spot will do you wonders, it’s extremely useful to have very strong core abdomen and pelvic muscles. The stronger these muscles, the easier it is to achieve G-Spot ejaculation. So here’s another excuse to get to those crunches! And remember, it takes patience, commitment and lots of practice!

​“I never squirt. And I NEVER want to squirt.” 

​Too bad for you. You are missing out on a good thing. The only thing about this kind of attitude is that if it happens, you will probably experience a lot of anxiety and embarrassment. You may want to look into an attitude of “I never squirt, but if it happens, it happens and I’m okay with it” in order to maintain healthy sense of well-being with yourself.

​“I’m a squirtee and I LOVE it!”

​What an awesome job you have, huh? Getting her to squirt can be one of the most enjoyable experiences you have! Finding the G-Spot is probably one of your specialties. Intoxicating her with stimulation to her G-Spot and other areas evoke you to almost orgasm (or maybe even orgasm!). Getting ejaculate on your face and body night be a priority in your eyes because if you please her, inevitably, you please yourself (go ahead and pat yourself on the back). Remembering to be receptive and pay attention to her body is extremely important and it comes pretty easy for you. Just a couple of small pieces advice for the squirtees: 1) don’t get discouraged if you can’t get her to squirt. It happens to all of us. 2) Try to prevent from being on the bottom during the 69 position if she’s a gusher. No one wants to drown, you included.

​“I’m a squirtee and I DON’T LIKE it.”

​Ask yourself, “what is the reason I don’t like to be squirted on?” Maybe you get turned off by the messiness or the anticipation of fluid you’re not familiar with may throw you off. These are all viable excuses and if your lover is a squirter, you should definitely ask her if she is (if she hasn’t volunteered that information to you already). Then, you can decide if you would like to put yourself in that position of experience something that isn’t pleasant to you. But then again, you never know…

​All in all, you are your own sexpert and only you can decide what you want in a sexual situation. Whether squirting is your thing or not, it’s always good to know yourself. Find those spots that titillate you and explore them to the fullest. Remember, there is always room to learn and grow.