Here are some BASIC FACTS that you should know:

1) HIV stands for Human Immunodeficiency Virus.

2) HIV can only be contracted through blood, semen, vaginal fluid and breast milk. It CANNOT be contracted through saliva, ​sweat or urine.

3) The two most common ways that people contract HIV is ​through having unprotected sex and sharing needles.

4) HIV weakens your immune system if you are not being ​treated with anti-retroviral treatment (ART). When your body ​has broken down so much that your viral load is high and the ​cells that you need to keep you strong are low, you may be ​diagnosed with AIDS (Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome).

5) Even though you may become HIV+, it’s not the end of the ​world as you know it. There are lots of people living healthy and ​happy lives because they are taking care of themselves and have ​a​ccess to treatment (there are many ways to get FREE ​treatment).

Here are some facts that you MAY NOT have known (that a person testing you will probably NOT say to you): 

1) It is possible that you can test HIV- on a test if you are HIV+ because rapid tests have a window period of 3 months (whoops – they tell you this). If you are knowingly HIV+ and you test HIV- on a test, it may be because your viral load is so low that you are undetectable.

2) It is possible to have a false positive on your rapid HIV test if you already have a disease that compromises your immune system. It’s better to get a blood test for HIV.

3) It is easier to get HIV if your system is already compromised with other bacterial or viral infections (over 80% of women don’t realize they have BV (Bacterial Vaginosis) which makes them more susceptible to HIV and other infections).

4) It is possible to have a healthy baby with two parents who are HIV+. Sperm & Eggs do not carry the virus. The baby is actually resistant to the disease. The only way that the baby’s health might be compromised is if the mother gets another type of infection.

5) It is a felony if you are HIV+ and knowingly infect another person.

6) There are many different strands and combination of strands of HIV, so just because you have HIV and your lover has HIV, it doesn’t mean that it’s okay to have sex. When you combine different strands, the medications that you have might not work with the strand(s) that you might acquire.

7) There is a DNA gene that is resistant to HIV, but it’s really rare to have. If you’re born here in the US, you probably aren’t resistant. 

8) PrEP (Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis) is a medication you can take to prevent you from getting HIV if you have HIV+ lovers. However, it does not help with other sexually transmitted infections.

9) If you are HIV+ and your viral load is low, passing the virus is much harder to do.

Although getting HIV can be a life-change, know that it’s not the end of the world if you become infected. With any infection or disease, there are ways to manage it according to your lifestyle and you just have to take care of yourself the best way you can. Arm yourself with the all the knowledge that you can in order to have a healthy and happy sex life. A sex-positive attitude starts with knowing your status. 

Currently, I’m reading a book about sex research and what scientists have found in recent studies. I have to say, it’s really advantageous to be in school right now and have access to the most current research studies regarding sexuality. Although this book was published in 2009, I’m sure it took a year or two or more to get it published, so I’m always curious to know what the updated statistics are if there are any. 

One fact that I learned was that the average amount of people that sleep with before they find the “perfect partner” is 12. Now, if you have less than this or way more than this, it doesn’t matter. 12 just seems to be the average ​number. I guess the number 13 is lucky after all. 

I’m curious to know that if you have the ‘perfect partner’ at this ​time in your life and you average how many people they’ve slept with the number that you’ve slept with if the number would be 12. Something tells me, not so much, but I’m not genuinely 
​interested in that type of sex research. Although I see it as useful ​in some contexts, some people have lost track on how many people they’ve slept with and that causes skewed biases. Besides, how many people are completely truthful to a random survey ​about their sex lives without having them feel like it’s some sort of attack on their morals or ethics. I’ve found that most people who find that they identify with an “alternative sexuality” are the ones that really talk about their sex lives in more of an explicit and affirming way.

Millennials are now growing up in a ‘hookup culture’ of stigma-free casual sex. The stigma of religion isn’t carrying as much weight as it used to because of the contradicting dynamics of the social culture as time moves forward. Everyone is concerned with their own morality and ethics and sexual energy and individualistic sexuality are recognized as vehicles of self-seeking pleasure with the logical reasoning of sexual health benefits. And besides, how would you know what that “perfect partner” looks like and how would you know that you don’t have several “perfect partners” for you? Love has been romanticized as perfect actions that are constantly occurring, when in reality, there are always ups and downs with the perfect person. The perfect person is not perfect all the time and they’re not perfect for you all the time. Sometimes they suck at being your partner. But if you have an understanding of each other and you know how to communicate effectively, you can get over your partner being not perfect a lot sooner than if you didn’t. 

I didn’t find any updated articles about the amount of partners folks have recently, but I hope someone’s doing that study for the near future. Friends with benefits is a pretty hot subject, but the most recent research shows that friends with benefits have less actual benefits than those who are married or in monogamous relationships. I guess that’s another argument for monogamy, but I’m sure I will get to that another day!